- Brian Wilson’s Beard: What’s not to like about a comically large died black beard? Only terrorists and Dodger fans (practically the same thing though) don’t like it. Plus it has the added benefit of selling merchandise for the team allowing them to spend freely to acquire the best talent in baseball, without the windfall provided by THE BEARD top free agent acquisitions Buster Posey and Freddy Sanchez would probably be playing for the Angels and Rangers right now.
- Panda Hats: Along the same line as THE BEARD, the Panda Hats that the Giants sell and so many Giants fans proudly wear are a testament to the Giants marketing department. Some teams would let a nickname for a star player just be a nickname but not the Giants who in an effort to bring everyone
- Brett Pill’s Perfect RBI Swing: If you can’t appreciate Brett Pill’s swing I’m not sure what’s wrong with you, the guy has the prettiest swing since Will Clark. And to top it off he has a nose for RBIs. The fact that he is buried on the depth chart just drives me nuts, luckily Pill will emerge and be the savior for the 2012 offense.
- Marty Lurie: Hours and hours of Giants baseball and a savior to KNBR who need less radio personalities. Marty is a blessing for any objective Giant fan who wants no nonsense analysis that isn’t tainted with that homer bias of so many others.
- The Fist Pump Cam: Who needs organ music when you got the guys from the Jersey Shore to pump up your corporate crowd. The fist pump cam is the breadcrumbs that bind the fan experience for the family of four that is decked out in panda hat fake beards and Hulk hands, point a camera at them and watch the magic happen!
- Garlic Fries and Chicken Strips: The greatest culinary addition San Francisco has given the world, served right here in our ballpark.
- Train sing-a-long’s: The greatest band in the history of San Francisco
- Veteran Savvy: You can’t teach experience, it is just something that rookies don’t have.
- The Journey 8th Inning: It doesn’t matter if it is ‘Lights’ or ‘Don’t Stop Believin’ nothing says Giants baseball like Steve Perry and some 80’s arena rock. I doubt I need to go any further if you are a TRUE Giants fan you already know that feeling that I am struggling to describe.
- The Rainy Day Fund: Only those short sighted would hate on the Rainy Day Fund, the Giants management is so worried about the future of the franchise they are willing to defer some money now to spend it down the road when maybe the money isn’t flowing like beer at a frat party. It may be hard to hold them to this because it isn’t like the front office is exactly forthcoming in sharing their books but would you really doubt this group of individuals to not follow up on their word to spend some of this extra money if lean times come in the future? Yeah I can’t think of any reason to think otherwise either. Thanks Larry Baer and Company for looking to the future!
–FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE–
The Rainy Day Fund has just served Giants Minor Leaguer Brett Pill with its complaint alleging his theft of their intellectual property.
Pill is using the sites very popular internet meme that was created in August of 2012 as his avatar on the popular internet social media site, twitter dot com.
“This is just outrageous. You can’t just copy and paste things and claim they are your own. Who does he think he is, Troy Nelson of 22gigantes.com? My clients will not sit back idely and let this go easily,” said attorney Bob Loblaw.
The amount of damages the Rainy Day Fund is seeking is currently not known.